Reflections on 2011

Last Chross Day of 2011, and I made the cut. Way to end the blogging year! Congratulations to all my fellow listees today.

This has been quite a year for me, with some amazing highs. First and foremost, I published a book. Not just any book -- my autobiography. It took a year-and-a-half to write it, and after that, the process of formatting and pulling it all together for publishing began. With the help of a talented photographer and the uber-talented Zelle, I got a spectacular cover. In August, it officially went on sale.

The feedback has been beyond gratifying. To everyone who has purchased it, reviewed it, commented about it, written to me about it... thank you. So far on Amazon, I have sixteen 5-star reviews, and I have a collection of heartfelt private messages that I treasure. And shooting the promo video with Richard Windsor was great fun.

Other experiences this year: Last January, I flew to Connecticut to work with Sarah Gregory and "Tubaman" Paul for a few days. That was unforgettable; not just the shoots themselves, but hanging out with them, the house we stayed in (complete with two dogs), the snowstorm, the laughs. Such a blast!

Spanking Court came into my life this year as well. Again, it wasn't just about the shoots -- I met a group of wonderful people who were all so very kind to me, told me I was a joy to work with. I'm not the easiest person in the world to get along with, but when I'm with people I like, my hard edges soften and my fun side emerges. They have moved from Hollywood to Northern CA, which saddens me, but who knows what 2012 will bring. They have lots of plans for new content and I hope there will be a place for me in them.

This time last year, John was recovering from a strep infection in his blood that nearly killed him. He has since gained back all the weight he lost and his physique is the best it's been since I've known him. Fifteen years plus, and I still can't take my eyes off him. :-) He has been healthy all year and I am so, SO very grateful for that. Neither one of us is perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but it seems we are perfect for each other.

He still thinks I'm beautiful, no matter how old I get. Last night when he called, he said, "I'd like to speak to the cutest girl in the world, please." Of course, I had to be a smart-ass and reply, "I'm sorry, you must have the wrong number," but it still gave me a big smile and warm fuzzies.

I had a fabulous year with ST, the top formerly known as New Guy. Week after week, we've had amazing scenes, but more than that, we have a close friendship that means a great deal to me. He's a special guy and I'm very lucky to know him. Here's to 2012 and lots more fun (and maybe some more videos!).

Of course, what goes up, must come down, and there have been some spectacular lows, some hurts and losses. I'd rather not dwell on those, however. They'll just start the waterworks going again, and really, I'm so fucking sick of tears. Overall, no one died, I have no work but I have money in the bank, I have a home I love, I have friends, I have John. If I were to make any resolution for the New Year (and I avoid them, as I don't believe in changes being dictated by a date on the calendar), it would be to try to focus a little bit more on the positives. Easier said than done, given my naturally pessimistic nature, but I'd like to try.

No big plans for New Year's Eve. Last year, John's next-door neighbor had one of his huge, noisy blow-outs that went all night, so I'm hoping that won't be the case again this weekend, but if it is, it is. At least I don't have to live next door to the guy; I can put up with him for one night. We will most likely see a movie and have a nice dinner out, and he has champagne waiting in the fridge for midnight.

I hope everyone will have a safe and happy New Year's Eve. May 2012 be a good year for us all. Thank you for visiting my little corner of the spanking blogosphere and I hope you'll keep returning. ♥