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Thursday, November 4, 2010

Are we having fun yet?

J was released from the hospital last night. You know what? I'm sick of referring to him as J. Who am I kidding -- pretty much everyone knows his name is John. John, John, John. He's a person, not an initial. No more J.

Anyway... they inserted his PICC yesterday. I've become an instant expert on PICCs in the past 24 hours -- gotta love the Internet. Peripherally Inserted Central Catheters go in the upper arm and the catheter threads up to the vein nearest the heart. John will shoot antibiotics into the PICC once a day. Basically, it looks like this, without getting too graphic:

He has a dressing over the insertion and can put a plastic sleeve over it (or plastic wrap) when he showers. He can drive, work, etc. No lifting, though, and no exertion. Once a week, he goes to the doctor to have the dressing changed, pick up another week's worth of drugs and basically check the thing to make sure all is OK.

I drove to Kaiser to pick him up. We stopped to buy him some groceries and then I got him home and settled in. It was 8:30, so he went straight to bed. I had brought an overnight bag, but he told me I should go on home, as he was OK, was going to sleep and then he'd be up early to leave for work.

So. Six weeks of this thing in his arm, and six weeks of antibiotics. The docs told him he should start feeling better and more energized by next week, but he's still quite sick and he's going to be fatigued easily for a while. They totally OKd his going back to work, though, as long as he just sits at a desk and keeps his hours shortened.

Life, of course, does not stop around us, just because John has been ill. Around the same time John went into the hospital, his 83-year-old mother had a seizure and she ended up in the hospital as well. She's home now, but she's disoriented and her motor skills aren't too great. Also, I spoke to my stepdad; my mother is falling a lot and he can't take her out anymore. They're trying to teach her how to use a walker, but she's resisting it.

I'm telling you, the fun never stops.

Not to sound harsh or unfeeling, but here's the deal. My mother has my stepfather and all her nurses and doctors at the facility. John's mother has three other kids, all local. Actually, one of his sisters gets a pass on helping out with Mom, because she has a business to run. And John gets a pass because, well, he almost died. So his other sister and his brother can take care of Mom. John needs to take care of himself now. And I need to focus on two people: Him and myself.

It was good to take him home. He's so thin and quite frail, but he's quite ambulatory and although his face looked exhausted, the color was a little healthier. He'd had a yellowish-gray cast to his face the past few weeks, and that's gone. Now it's just a matter of time. I'm sure he's privately mourning his beautiful sculpted body, but he'll get that back eventually.

How am I, people ask. Edgy. Emotional. Easily touched off. Earlier this week, a good friend told me that her beloved old cat is in his final days, and I wept as if he were my own cat. Dammit... just writing this is making me cry again. See what I mean?

Time for some fun and distractions. Next week, I'm playing. I need to. I feel like I'm never going to have sex again in this lifetime, but at least I can get spanked, thank goodness. And I need to laugh. Maybe I should stop watching Six Feet Under for a while and watch Marx Brothers movies instead. And look at the bright side: No more election ads every two seconds! The clocks go back this weekend, so I get another whole hour of precious soothing darkness! (Yes, I'm weird. What else is new.)

Onward. Thanks again for the comments, the emails, the calls, everything. I love my friends. :-)

EDIT: On a funny note -- I was looking at my Keyword phrases (what people have used to find my blog) and saw this:

"I have the flu" fever

WTF? I had to laugh -- can you imagine the poor schnook out there, trying to research his flu symptoms and he gets linked to a spanking blog? How perverse is that?


  1. Jeez, Erica! Take it easy and take a deep breath! He's home. You'll get through this. He'll get better. Gia and I are thinking about you and send you two good vibes (not THOSE kind, perv!). ;-)


  2. Craig -- thanks. Yes. Must breathe. I forget to do that sometimes.

  3. I'm thinking about you to, dear friend, and it sounds like the worst is over. Of course you're stressed. Some play will take care of that, so you can take care of yourself and John.

    I currently have a dog who has to have his leg wrapped in plastic every time he goes out, so he doesn't pee on his bandage. Condoms are recommended for that, but I'm too cheap. I use plastic bags from newspapers. I don't suppose John has to cover his arm thingy for the same reason :)

    Hugs to you both,

  4. Aargh! I meant "too". See how upset I am?

  5. Hermione -- poor doggie! I hope he will be OK. So stressful when our pets aren't well. Noooo... I don't think John will pee on his IV site, but thank you for the funny image! :-)

  6. ahhh....

    john joins the club. i had a picc once upon a time. no fun but not painfull.

    supprise him with a tray of sushi. i know you guys like it. miso soup, unagi, toro or maguro, ebi, uni, tamago, natto......yum!!!! healthy and heavenly.

    glad he's home and getting well.

    think about some of that herbal stuff. i have faith in modern medicine but i like to hedge my bets.



  7. ddon -- funny you should mention that. Last night when we went to Whole Foods, that's exactly what we got for him: miso soup with tofu, and two trays of sushi. And grapes.

  8. I am sending a quiet hug and a moment of calm.

  9. Poppy -- thank you, dear. Oddly, I've gone from edgy to deeply fatigued this afternoon. I guess it's to be expected.

  10. Hello my Erica i am so happy that John is home YAY.that is WONDERFUL news :-)the picc thingy looks a bit scary but as long as it doesn't hurt i guess it's ok.once you get spanked you will feel so much better you will be less stressed,I am sorry to hear about John's mom and your mom i hope they get well soon. reading about your friend's poor kitty made me feel sad too i love animals :-( wishing John lots of good luck with the picc and wishing you good luck as well, much love and hugs to both of you xoxo from your naughty girl Jade

  11. Glad to hear he's home, and almost as glad to hear he's no longer an initial. ;-)

    You're absolutely right that you need some attention, even if it's only from yourself. And not that I have to tell you, but crying is a really good stress relief valve, so don't hold back, whatever the reason - or none.

    I really do like the photo on the previous post. I see why it's your favorite.

    Hang in there, girl.


  12. When it rains...Too much chaos for 2 people to endure. You and John deserve to restore your happy routine as soon as time allows.

    Loved your contribution to Cause For Paws. So sassy and comical, just the way we love you. At the end it sounded like you were playfully swearing, or taking the Lord's name in vain directed at Richard. :) By the way, I still have 2 bruises and the slightest soreness from last Tues. spanking. Awwww!

    New Guy has much lost time to make up for. Oh your "poor" bottom. lol!

  13. Hello my Erica sorry i forgot to add something i loved your contribution for cause for paws you did AWESOME and you were so funny i laughed hehehe,i know i could take a hard spanking for all the animals i would do anything for animals cause i love them so much :-) THANKS for helping Pixie and all the animals YOU ROCK LOL AND HUGS from your naughty girl Jade xoxo

  14. Jade -- I don't think the picc is painful; maybe a little uncomfortable and awkward. But I'll be glad when it's out of him!

    Devlin -- thanks. :-) Crying and vigorous exercise are indeed my friends.

    Kelly -- Yeah, how about that CP4 video, huh? That lifted my spirits today. And yes, New Guy has some catching up to do. :-D

  15. Ack... that should have been C4P, not CP4. Guess I have CP on my mind. ;-)

  16. Watch some Marx Brothers. Laughter does help. Oh, and the person searching your site for information on fighting the flu, try spanking. It may not cure the flu, but you might feel better. Also, for the person with the flu, watch some Marx Brothers movies, or whatever it is that makes you laugh. (Personally, a lot of these political commercials make me laugh. My favorite is Christine O'Donnell saying "I am not a witch, I am you." Hey, if you have to spend money explaining you are not a witch, your campaign is in trouble. Besides, what's wrong with being a witch. You want to be a witch, what do I care? Finally, sorry, but Christine, you are not me. First of all, I am male and you are a female. Usually I don't have to explain these things, but the more I learn about you, it seems I do....

    So, may you and John (I am glad I may write out his name) laugh, enjoy, and feel better together.

  17. Paul -- I have been sitting on my hands in an effort to keep myself from making political comments. The whole situation is too damn depressing. However, I will say that I'm glad all the commercials are behind us. And Christine O'Donnell, Meg Whitman and Carly Fiorina can all get on their brooms and fly away.

  18. Frankly.. sex is overrated....

    Just get off on the spanking.. basically the same release.

    :-) ---> aren't I helpful?