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Friday, October 14, 2011


While on Twitter the other night, I saw that someone had posted a link they found in "Kink-Aware Professionals." So I checked it out, and found this.

Spanking For Wellness

Go ahead. Go read for a while. I'll wait. You don't have to read it all; I recommend scanning Who We Are and Services.

So. What was your instinctive reaction? Mine was horror. And I'm not really sure why.

Reading through it, it sounds quite legitimate and non-exploitive. Spanking used as therapy. Pretty much like what we've talked about many times in the various forums, about how spanking can induce catharsis, emotional release, tears, guilt purging. Increase endorphins and elevate moods, etc. So why does this sound creepy to me?

Maybe it's the New Age-y feel of it. The cheerful photos of flowers and a woman frolicking in the ocean. The descriptions of the man and woman who run this clinic, institute, whatever it is.

"Rev. Jenellen Fischer... is a Spiritual Counselor, Liturgical Singer, Reiki Master, Intuitive Empath, Energetic Healer, and a Sensual Shaman, utilizing sensual energy for the healing of geographic locations, people, and animals."

"Steve Karuna Maitri has been a Zen Buddhist practitioner...for more than a decade....[H]e combines mindfulness meditation, deep listening, spanking and massage to help his clients transform their lives and move forward on the path towards being whole."

I dunno... I never thought of spanking as a companion of aromatherapy and having my chakras cleaned. Does the arrangement of their spanking furniture have the proper feng shui? And how do you know when a geographic location is healed, anyway?

OK, suppose it's legitimate; a safe place to explore spanking as a form of therapy. But what about people like us, for which spanking is either discipline, erotic, or both? Under Services, they say the treatment is completely non-sexual. They go on to say that it's not about discipline or punishment. Then what is it, exactly?

I really don't see this working for people who are already spanking fetishists/enthusiasts, because it doesn't fulfill the fantasy aspect. And for people who aren't... why the hell would they choose to get spanked? Why not just have the feel-good stuff -- the massage, the listening, etc.? For someone who isn't into spanking, why would they subject themselves to pain and "being treated like a child" -- and pay for it, no less? (There is no mention anywhere on the site of the costs. I wonder what one shells out for this.)

Like I said, I'm not really sure why I'm so creeped out by this. So what do you guys think?

It's Friday/Chross day. I'm in a bit of a melancholy place today, feeling the empty ache of various losses. Maybe my chi needs realigning. Or maybe I just need a warm hug and a kiss from John and a damn good spanking from ST. Fortunately, neither one of them is going anywhere. My rocks of Gibraltar.

Have a good weekend, y'all.


  1. Hi Erica, WOW this is creepy i don't think this would work for me either cause like you have stated the fantasy isn't there and how in the hell can a spanking not be considered discipline LOL these people need to GET REAL, I am not having a good day either i will email you :-( I know i need a damn good spanking from somebody,then after the spanking lot's of hug's i hear ya my dear friend :-)Wishing you and John a fun and relaxing weekend, Love you both big hug's always from your naughty girl Jade XOXO

  2. I agree that it's creepy because of the same reasons you identified! The whole New Age feel of it--I mean, I guess if you were going to try to get it out there as accepted in the mainstream, try to do it by saying it's New Age--but it wouldn't really help me feel any more like I was just going into some normal appointment! For me, spanking is too personal for this kind of thing. Just, something about this gives me the willies too.

    I did have a flash to being at the doctor for other reasons, having to drop trou to get a shot in the butt. He sees the marks and his only comment? "I see you go to a spanking therapist. Is that working to manage your depression okay?" LOL Hmm, this might have some merits...

  3. Jade -- hope your day gets better.

    LB -- Ha! Only in the fantasy stories. In reality, he'd call Social Services. I guess you could say you slipped and fell on your healing crystals.

  4. Wait. Wait one minute. You mean I can get PAID for spanking??? Will they hire me??? I know for a fact my spankings are CATHARTIC and elicit a HEALING EMOTIONAL RESPONSE. Why didn't I think of this???

  5. Craig -- for shame. This is not about MONEY. This is about personal growth, wholeness and healing, emotional, physical, spiritual and psychological well being.

    Oh, and perhaps some self-actualization too. ;-)

  6. When I was checking things out about TTWD, I ran across this outfit. My feeling? Run! Away! Fast! Besides, I have someone I can go to now who is safe and knows what they are doing.

    Maybe they read that study done in Russia about depression and spanking. Only they whipped the people. Found it did help. It ain't a cure-all, folks.

    For me, it is the spanking itself that I want. I don't see it as discipline. Up to a point, it just plain feels good.

  7. Not sure. Although the number is small, I've known people who have insisted that spanking is purely therapeutic for them -- no arousal, no need to be "disciplined", no power play. It's almost like the pain from a spanking allows their internal pain to find a safe voice.(I can relate to this sometimes.)

    While this particular duo seems a little too new-agey, I am a fan of the concept for OTHER people.

    Very interesting.

    Have a fantastic weekend!



  8. Bobbie Jo -- I agree there is therapy to be found in spanking. It's just the way these people present it... it skeeved me, somehow.

    Pink -- for those who need external pain in order to process internal pain, I'd say spanking from a professional is a much safer route than self-harm. But yeah... way too New Age-y. Almost seemed like a parody.

  9. I found that site creepy as all heck. I'm creeped out by anyone who tries to suggest that spanking can be good for everyone: that is to say, non spankos. I had someone try to convince me that because I get such a positive mood adjustment from a spanking, I should try and convince my friends to try it, too. It doesn't work that way. Spanking is not inherently centering, realigning, stress reliving, et cetera. It is just those things for people like us because we have the need in us and we can therefore manipulate that need and desire to various effects.

    The new-age-y attitude also bugged me. Spanking is not a feel good, lotus and lily pad, yoga poses and water droplets kind of thing for me. Seeing it in that context was kind of surreal. As soon as I saw the graphic design of that site, I had a "WTF?" reaction.

    I'm having a kind of blah day today, too: feeling a bit gloomy. I could do with a good, hard spanking followed by some warmth and affection. Unfortunately, that's going to have to wait. >_<

  10. Alex -- Right? I could practically smell the incense wafting from my monitor.

    Sorry you're down... I hope things perk up for you. Loved your "first spanking" blogs.

  11. That site? Do-do, do-do; do-do, do-do, do-do....... Remember Outer Limits? Dating myself I guess. LOL

  12. But no mention if they offered internships! :)

    I don't have a clue what to make of their agenda. It SOUNDS helpful and all, but I had a sarcastic chuckle when I saw the term "Reverend". Religion and spanking together reminds me of a cult like establishment. Would love to see photos of the founders. Then you could see if they've ever attended any of the bigger spanking parties.

  13. Hoorah, so glad you wrote this post! You are addressing what I wanted to ask but was mangling with Twitter.

    I don’t like it because I resent the marketing pitch, the attempt to draw this holistic, cozy, yet professional feel. I don’t get a “shady” vibe, I just get a “bullshit” vibe. So much effort to disassociate the image of what they do from the sexual/fantasy/discipline aspects of spanking that it just doesn’t ring true.

    I think they are pitching their “services” to people who aren’t comfortable, either with their interest in spanking or how to proceed. PROBLEM: My interest in spanking is wrong. SOLUTION: it’s not wrong, it’s therapy and therapy isn’t wrong. We are credible and professional, just look at our credentials / newletters / workshops / links. PROBLEM: I’m just admitting my interest in spanking and have no idea how to explore / am scared to proceed. SOLUTION: this place makes it feel safe.

    For me, I resent (grrrr) what I perceive to be an inherently dishonest presentation. Kelly, I didn’t even notice the “reverend” part – more grrrr! Still, I bet they get takers.

  14. Kelly -- yeah, don't even get me started on the religious aspect. I, too, am curious about what Steve looks like.

    Bronte -- you didn't mangle it; it's just too hard to articulate things when you only have 140 freaking characters.

    I'm glad I blogged about this. People can explain their thoughts so much better here! :-)

  15. My stepmother is into all sorts of new-agey metaphysical stuff, and I find it hard to take sometimes. Spanking may be a sort of therapy at times for me, but it is not a one-size-fits-all kind of thing. Even if the spanking is non-erotic, there's no getting away from the fact that it is still an intimate activity.

    In Russia they have these bath houses in the woods and part of the treatment is being flogged with wet branches. It is said to be invigorating. But that's still not the same thing as spanking. Just saying...

  16. Dana -- yikes; not the same thing at all. I think I'd pass on that!

  17. Erica,

    I agree with Dana here. I know about the Russian saunas where they use birch branches to hit themselves with. A good example of that routine is a scene in the movie North to Alaska (with your favorite actor in it :-P Sorry. Couldn't resist LOL) All they are doing is stimulating the skin to get the blood flowing. Much like the sweat houses the American Indians used. Same idea and very different from spanking.

    Spanking for me is somewhat therapeutic. And, as I have said before, up to a certain point, it just feels good.

  18. I don't think it's creepy so much as kind of sad and pathetic.

    Here's the one line that truly makes me think BS! It's on the "Women and Spanking" link on that site:

    "Can you imagine if we had to go through this same type of obstacle course of emails, online sites, and discreet groups to get a therapeutic massage?"

    See, they know about the obstacle course of emails, discreet groups, and online sites... they're spankos! They're just full of BS. If it was truly therapeutic like a massage- why does it say female clients may contact him, and male or female clients may contact her?

    No prices, no description of facilities... makes me think they had the following conversation at one point:

    "Hey, honey, we're not having much luck finding new spankees on fetlife cause they all want to see a picture before they meet us, and we're broke... but I had this awesome idea... see, it's all about marketing...we'll get a cheap website, and I found this place where we can get online divinity degrees for $19.99. Then all we need to do spout some pseudo new age psychobabble about the benefits of spanking, and we can get folks to pay us for spanking them!"

    "Sounds great, honey. I took a massage class once, let's throw that in there too. I can get my girlfriend that has a blog to post a one paragraph entry, and we can have a link to 'media' and we can make up some client feedback, let's just put it in different font so it looks like we actually cut-and-pasted it from some real emails or something! but no prices online, and no pictures of us!"

    Then again, maybe I should start my own spanking therapy "salon" ...please send a picture along with a description of your interest in spanking before I determine if I think you might benefit from this therapy I'm offering! (rolling my eyes)

  19. Dusty -- (laughing) You ARE funny. Thank you for the giggles.

    Interesting! I didn't catch that she spanks both men and women, but he'll only spank women. "Yup, this is purely non-sexual and therapeutic, but if you have a dick, please see my partner."

  20. Well, Erica, I try real hard. As soon as I set up my blog I'll be sure to include an application and encourage you to fill it out to see if you might benefit from my "therapy" if you ever travel down this way. Just be aware my therapy also includes a lot of green vegetables, and by that I mean mainly pickles and lettuce! ;)

  21. Hmm, not sure what to think about that. If it works for some then I suppose that's good for them. Not something I'd personally try though. Not a fan of the New Age-y stuff myself.

  22. "Steve Karuna Maitri" is probably his scene name. Is he on Fetlife? And what the heck is "deep listening"? Did you notice that the services page is the only one in bold?

    The group workshops sound like fun, but alas, we wouldn't be able to join; Ron is an atheist, and wouldn't go for the religious aspect of spanking. Come to think of it, neither would I.

    I might consider joining their Yahoo group; it might provide some entertainment.


  23. Sooner or later they'll be touting their peace, love and wellness mantra on "The View", "Dr. Phil", "Dr. Oz."etc, etc, etc.

    It would be great if a media employee went there undercover to find out the whole story.

  24. I'm not sure about this organization, I may have to think on it some more and come back. But I have been to one of those Russian bath houses, and when they swing those things hard it's not all that different from a spanking ;)


  25. Erica,

    Like Pink, I have encountered a *few* who voice no sexual or discipline/punishment-motivated want or need for spanking. They say that, for them, the spanking is enough in itself. They have no interest in role-play, scolding, or even intimacy.
    I guess that there are enough out there showing interest to motivate someone to offer these types of services...and there's something for everyone, as they say...but I believe that the great majority of us have some emotional/physical/sexual trigger that steers the fetish.

    To each his own, but please - for goodness' sake - no new age music during spankings!

    - Dana

  26. Well, though I do understabnd this is not your piece of cake (and neither is it mine), I guess it does not hurt (if this is a helpful expression here) that the advertise the idea of stress release to spanking though.

    And it just has got me deepened appreciation from my spankee. ;-)

  27. A little too new-agey/spiritual for me. I can relate to the whole spanking for fun or relaxation thing because I don't do discipline, but that doesn't work with a stranger, for me.

    I'd probably have less problem with the site if it had been set up more with the spa service type of stuff and had spanking included, rather than with all the "psychological therapy" and "spirituality" stuff.

    In any case, I wouldn't go to it no matter how it's set up because I enjoy getting spanked by people I have a connection with.

  28. Lea -- different strokes, if you'll pardon the expression. I still wonder what they charge.

    Hermione -- LOL! Never seen Steve on FetLife, I don't think. Ah, another reason I like Ron.

    Kelly -- Dr. Phil has already experienced one spanko. ;-)

    Em -- I suppose it's not much different from a birching... but I wouldn't want to feel those branches on my back or legs, I don't think.

    Dana -- what, no Enya? (zzzzzzz...)

    MrJ -- hey, if it works, it works. I just wonder for whom.

    Iggy -- exactly. The connection is necessary, for me. I guess if you just want the sheer physicality of it, then it could be anyone.

  29. I've seen this site before! Creeped me out too. I don't need my chakras cleaned with a spanking - I need my clock cleaned, so to speak. Bunch of new age hippies trying to justify their kink as therapy. Don't horror movies start out in places like this?

  30. I have been laughing my head off at some of the comments here. "What, no Enya?" Or, "I don't need my chakras cleaned - I need my clock cleaned..." Love it! As for music during a spanking, how about "Night On Bald Mountain"? ;-}

  31. Karyn -- now that's a horror movie I'd watch.

    Bobbie Jo -- I like that piece! Interesting play on words, too... of course, for those who spank boys, sometimes the mountains are hairy.

  32. Oh, Erica!!!! Watch out or I just might send you another "hot" video. :-P

  33. Ouch, guys. I am sorry that you got such negative impressions from what we have to offer our clients. For those who may be interested, after two years in the seminary, two years of spiritual counseling training and several years of therapeutic practice before moving into this work, we made a decision to be of service to those who resonate with spanking as a gateway to emotional release, catharsis, relaxation and a general sense of well being.

    Our therapeutic counseling and spanking sessions grew out of our assisting clients in spiritual counseling, meditation and mindfulness practice, energy work (Reiki, life coaching and Tantric education. We have combined them into a practice that helps every client we work with in meaningful ways that have an impact on their lives.

    Most of our clients are folks involved in leadership in the business, medical, psychological, educational or political worlds helping others in their own fields through service. I work with both men and women because I am wired energetically that way, but after working with both men and women for several years, my partner realized that he was wired best energetically to offer his services to women, as working with men can be extremely draining for him.

    You are right in guessing that our practice is often a safe gateway into experiencing spanking for beginners or those looking to understand why they have these needs to begin with. Not everyone is in a place where parties are the best fit for them, and we are happy to provide an alternative to help have their needs met in a clear place. We don't use role play or offer discipline- it's just us, really us, and our clients, really them- you can read more about why that is on our website if you are interested.

    We sound new agey because we kind of are-ish. We hold space for those who are into connecting with the Divine through this practice, and those who are just interested in a safe and loving space to explore. We spank all our clients with loving care and focused attention based on their needs, not ours.

    If anyone has any specific questions about what we offer or just seeks to understand the place from which we come, we would be happy to address your questions personally. Please feel free to email me at This isn't our job- we have other work that we do as well- to us it's our calling, and we are honored to be of service to those who feel they can benefit. It is NOT for everyone- just for those who need it. :-)

    Wishing you all deep peace,

    - Jenellen

    Rev. Jenellen Fischer