Erica repents in Spanking Court

Yes, you're reading that correctly. (Make yourselves comfortable; this is long.)

It may be a while before the scenes I shot yesterday will be up on the Spanking Court site, because they have so many in reserve, especially after their weekend at the Tampa Tanners party. And I am dying to talk about the shoot. So... I will do my best to share some details, without giving it all away.

I was so eager to see everyone again, as it had been three months. The two scenes I was to shoot had this basic outline: Since the Court Disciplinarian and I had been at odds, I would be complaining about him to the Judge, who would bring V in to tell his side of things. We'd have another session, in which I'd be even more obnoxious than before. After that, V would haul ME in front of the Judge, who would then finally figure out that I'm the troublemaker. He'd assign a much stricter sentence... and in an unprecedented move, he'd sit in on the punishment to watch. Yikes!

I got there a little bit before 2:00, and they were all in the conference room eating lunch. Big hugs all around, one after the other. I was a little disappointed; I had been hoping to meet Alex (JustAlex on FetLife), as I knew she'd shot earlier. But unfortunately, she had to leave. You can read all about her shoot here. She broke one of their paddles, bless her heart. :-)

Sat and chatted with everyone, got my makeup put on. I couldn't resist giving V a hard time, as I hadn't heard from him in a long time. He and Dana have been extremely busy since their move and I wasn't really mad, but I was needling him anyway, saying he didn't wish me a Happy Birthday. After all, Dana did! He asked me if I'd like a birthday spanking right now, but I just told him to shut up and stuck my tongue out at him. Probably not the smartest thing to do, but you know, I can't help myself.

Then it was time to shoot. We filmed the first courtroom scene, which started with just me stating all my complaints, then a "recess," then V joining us and telling his side. V said that while I was polite and poised in Court, I was a completely different personality in the sentencing room. At this point, the Judge didn't really know who or what to believe, so he ordered another session and admonished both of us.

I got into the scrubs -- great news! They'd gotten new ones; instead of that hideous Prison Orange, these were light blue. Much more flattering color, IMO. This session was to be 150 with a leather strap. Of course, more sparks flew between the Disciplinarian and me, and toward the end, I'm afraid I called him a name that wasn't very nice. (Dana and Cali said they almost choked, holding back their laughter.) Those 150 strap strokes were rather fierce, but afterward, Dana came over and was waxing incredulous about how I was merely overall pink, like I'd just received a hand spanking.

We all took a break and I changed into my second outfit. The fact that I rarely mark was advantageous in this case, because now I could shoot my next scene and wouldn't look like I just did one. There was a lot of chatting and laughing, as always, and, aside from one more person doing a brief scene later in the afternoon, I was it for the day. So we took our time a bit, which was relaxing.

Then it was Reckoning Time. In front of the Judge, I waited for the Disciplinarian to tell what I'd called him. But he didn't.

No, he made me tell it. Said he didn't want to repeat it, out of respect for the Court, and suggested to the Judge that he ask me. I sort of hemmed and hawed and started to make excuses, but the Judge interrupted my back-pedaling and demanded that I come right out and say it. What else could I do?

Well, of course, the Judge was ticked off. I tried to plead and protest, but he would have none of it. I was sentenced to 200 with a wooden paddle -- and he'd sit in and watch, so he could see for himself exactly what was going on.

Uh oh. Clearly, I was toast.

After we finished that scene and the cameras stopped rolling, Heinz commented to me, "OK, in this next session, you'll need to start being a bit contrite."

I knew exactly what he meant -- it was transition time. I'd gone as far as I could go with the sass and baiting. The battle of wills between V and me, fun as it was, couldn't continue indefinitely. The Court had to regain full control and credibility; I'd wrought enough havoc and now it was time to pay. And my demeanor needed to reflect that.

I thought about it, tried to transfer my head space from feisty to compliant. We all talked about it for a few minutes just before we shot that final scene. It was decided that I'd try to mind my manners and be respectful, but of course, about a quarter to a third of the way through, I'd have a snippy outburst. The Judge would then see that V had been telling the truth, and he'd order more intensity for the remainder. V, who would start with a lighter, thinner paddle, would replace that with a heavier one. (gulp) The exact type I say no to, usually. But this time, I wanted it. I knew I'd need to be pushed, if I was going to achieve the right attitude.

So we began. The lighter paddle stung a lot, but the impact wasn't bad. I started out angry and resentful, but trying to hide it... and failing miserably. I don't remember which stroke we were on -- 30? 50? -- when I mouthed off, but the Judge gave me a sound lecture and then instructed V to switch up to the heavy paddle.

I admit it. When that first stroke hit me with a solid, dull THUNK, I had a split-second of panic. Omigod. I have to go to 200 with this?? Holy crap. I hunkered down, braced myself, lost my awareness of everyone around me and went deep into my head.

Sometimes when I'm scening, on camera or off, I have an internal dialogue going with myself, especially when I'm struggling. I thought to myself, "Can I really do this? God, it hurts... can I?"

And from deep within, I sensed the answer. You can. You want to. You will.

Mind over matter. Endorphins over pain. I was in a groove and the count kept going. And going. Steadily and hard. And somehow, it became real. Hard to explain, but it was. I forgot the cameras.

Breathe, Erica.

Somewhere around 100, I begged the Judge to have V go back to the original paddle. He refused.

I lost all desire to sass and be snarky. I stopped fighting the pain and rode it.

Then, around 150, that inner dialogue came up again, out of nowhere.

Embrace this. Experience it fully. This may be the last time you're here.

That was most likely true. After all, we had gone as far as we could go with this scenario, right? It had been so much fun, I adored these people, but now, given the nature of this scene, this was probably the grand finale.

I rarely cry from spanking pain alone, both because I like it and because I'm too stubborn. But throw an emotion into the mix? Waterworks.

I cried when ST and I did that punishment scene that he taped earlier this year. But I've never cried on camera at a professional shoot before. Not even close. Until yesterday. Don't remember when it started, but I think it was somewhere between 150-170. And I wept my way through the remainder. I believe around 180, I blurted repeatedly that I was sorry.

Damn. Not sure how I'd gone there, but it was real and I'm glad I did.

The hardest part was afterward, I think. I didn't have the luxury of just lying there on the bench, closing my eyes and burying my face. I had to get up, my legs rubbery. People came to me one by one, hugging me, asking if I was all right. I quickly regained my humor -- when Heinz hugged me, telling me what a good job I'd done, I said, my voice cracking with tears, "So, was that contrite enough for you?" He laughed.

V stood by, watching me, his face mildly shell-shocked, as in "wow, did we just do that??" I went and hugged him tight.

I cleaned up and got dressed, but I didn't feel like leaving. My limbs were heavy and my brain felt waterlogged. Cali told me I was welcome to hang out, so I lay on the little couch outside of the courtroom and spaced out while they were in there shooting Lisa's court scene.

A few minutes later, the door opened once again and Lisa went to change into the scrubs. Dana came out, glanced over at me, then called back in, "So Heinz, what do we have, about 54 seconds before we shoot the next scene?" Wha...? Fifty-four seconds? Did I hear that correctly, and if so, what the hell was she talking about?

Then V came out, walked over, grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet. "C'mon, Erica," he said, walking me back into the sentencing room. Fifty-four... oh, GAWD. Now I got it.

Sure enough, over his knee I went and down came my leggings. Everyone watched while he gave me a belated birthday spanking, cheering and calling out encouragement. As if he needed it! He made it into a sort of "This Is Your Life" -- "Sixteen! Now you could drive! Twenty-one! Now you could drink! Twenty-five! Now your car insurance premiums came down!" Oh, brother. And he wasn't patty-caking me, either.

And Dana, my long-lost sister, my friend? At the end, she piped up with, "You're probably going to forget her birthday next year too, so you might as well give her that spanking now too!" Thanks a lot, Missy!

It was just what I needed to lighten my mood back up, to make me laugh. Have I mentioned lately that I love these people?

I left for John's around 6:00, happy to be going to see him. We had a nice night; went to dinner and I told him all about the day. He'd had to take him mom out to lunch by himself, and he'd asked what excuse he should give for me. I said, tell her I'd had friends coming into town from out of state this weekend and I wanted to see them. Well, that was true, wasn't it?

So, after 150 strap strokes and 200 with a wooden paddle, all with no warm-ups, the million-dollar question is: Am I marked?

Barely. It's kind of scary. Just some very faint discoloration on the left cheek and a bit of marking on the right sweet spot.

Doesn't that mark on the right look like an M? For Miscreant, I guess. :-)

Might not look bad, but daaaamn, it's sore. All the way down through the muscle. I am so screwed when ST comes over tomorrow...