These weekends are quite the extravaganza, and people attend for different reasons. Some enjoy socializing with their friends from around the country and beyond. Others are shameless spank hos (raising hand sheepishly) who love to play as much as possible, along with the aforementioned socializing. However, despite my reputation for being Little Miss Hard-Ass From Hell (as Razor Ryan once called me), I have learned from painful experience that pacing is absolutely essential. I need to last for three days. And while the spirit is willing, the flesh is sometimes rather uncooperative, especially if it's been pounded on with heavy artillery.
So, regarding those frat paddles and other heavy wooden slabs some of y'all call toys?
(Thanks to my buddy Zelle, who created this graphic just for me!)
That's right, folks. On these weekends, my bottom is a no-wood zone. OK, canes are an exception, as long as the wielder knows what he's doing. Or even some lighter, thinner wooden implements, like a lightweight hairbrush, that sting but don't feel like you're hitting me with a table leg. But leave those frat paddles et. al. in your toy bag.
Mind you, I'm not speaking for all spankees, just myself. However, you may want to take heed: Many of us bottoms endeavor to enter the weekend on a lighter note and then build up. These heavy implements tend to mark and bruise, and even if they don't, they impart a whole lot of pain. And it is usually considered very poor form to mark a bottom at the onset of a three (or four, or five, for some) day spanking weekend. Oh, you can do it, if you're absolutely determined to do so. But you might find that everyone but the most diehard masochists will treat you like you had garlic and onions with limburger cheese sauce for dinner: they will stay away. Many other tops don't like to spank a bottom that is already all bruised up, so these poor prematurely marked spankees will be deprived. Not nice.
I don't care how finely crafted the implement is. Some of you actually make these things yourselves -- I don't care. I don't care how long you sanded, polished and smoothed it. I don't care if you even cut the fucking tree down yourself. The answer is still NO.
Yeah, I know your hands hurt. Our butts hurt more. Boo hoo. If your hands give out, then go for some leather. Or, here's a concept... (gasp) Don't spank so @#$%ing hard, maybe? :-D Just a thought. Could work. Or not.
So, what's our mantra for the Shadow Lane weekend? Pace ourselves! Happy hands, happy bottoms. Win-win.
Oh, and that last word I mentioned in the blog title? Here ya go; any questions?
Think you're pretty tough, huh? |
Not so tough now! Say bye-BYE.... |
roflmao! OMG.. too funny! Great blog!
ReplyDeleteI too have an aversion to wood. Matter o' fact, I did buy two of MrZia's paddles to get me acclimated to wood. (I have a love/hate relationship with those paddles!)
At the last party, I played twice a day with the same Top 3 days in a row. (ya think I liked his style? LOL) Anyhow.. he did his job, and kept a watchful eye on my booty .. so although I did have some lovely marks at the end of the party .. he knew where to play and where to back away (since it was his "handy" work)
WOW he was so much fun!
Have a great time at Shadow Lane.. I hope one day to get to come to that party!
~Zelle
Sounds like complete and utter propaganda to me, Erica!
ReplyDeletereica,
ReplyDeletemy goodness [i know, i know, goodness has nothing to do with it] you look at least 20 years younger than your admited age. add to that that the camera seems to love you and wow!!!!
i agree on impliments. i've always thot that the flat of a hand was just fine. i know people collect and are facinated by them [more power to you] but like barbed wire and glass telephone resistors you collect them you don't use them.
a cane, strap, tawse, or heavy paddle can cause hottific damage if not used carefully. the check is in the mail isn't the only lie out there. i'll be gentle and it won't hurt [too much] are others.
zelle....neat design, you are good.
best ddon
.... Thanks ddon! How could I resist helping out a friend who as Craig says.. "Is propagandizing".. hahaha!
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmmmmmm ....... Question ...... If you get spanked first thing in the morning at the party with a wood paddle ........ Is that considered " getting morning wood "....
ReplyDeleteJust Curious
ROFLMAO
Hello my Erica i love your pics they are adorable :-) i laughed so hard when you said that you don't care if the person chopped down the F*****g tree themself it's NO hehehe you are too funny,Zelle your design was amazing and cool.have a wondeful time at the SL party wish i could go.LOL and HUGS from your naughty girl Jade xoxo
ReplyDeleteSo...you're saying that on your third day, all the tops whose hands were bruised by your bottom can break out their sorority paddles?
ReplyDeleteMind if I use that logo?
ReplyDeleteI'd like to have it screen printed on a pair of panties. ;)
Erica,
ReplyDeleteI love the Beatles poster. Reminds me of my teenage years. Was one candle enough?
Hugs,
Hermione
I totally understand where you are coming from Erica. I myself have a severe allergy to wood and cannot have any wood anywhere near my behind. In fact, just to be safe... perhaps my allergy should just ban wood completely from Vegas. :) Like the kid with the peanut allergy that prevents airplanes from passing out nuts, wouldn't this be the same?
ReplyDeleteZelle -- I have a feeling that logo you made for me is going to travel! :-D Wow... twice a day for three days in a row? That's a connection!
ReplyDeleteCraig -- You would think that, sweetie.
Ddon -- Who is this Reica and what's her secret to looking 20 years younger? ;-)
Alan -- Noooo comment!
Jade -- I promise I'll be writing a full report. :-)
Bonnie-Jo -- Errrrrrr... ummmm... NO!
barely-pink -- By all means! Spread the word!
Hermione -- I picked up that tapestry years ago at Beatlefest. I know it's probably silly for a 50-something woman to still have Beatles art up on her walls, but oh well. One candle would have to do; I'm scared of fire and just messing around with that one candle made me nervous! lol
Kat -- Yes! I agree... ban the damn wood altogether. And to help those who suffer peanut allergies, perhaps you should write your own PSA for the SL party and tell all the tops to keep their nuts to themselves as well. :-D
ReplyDelete@Erica.. I emailed Barely-pink one of the ones you didn't use (the maple one)..
ReplyDeleteThanks, Zelle and Erica! I'll give a full report on my attempts at screen printing (and the subsequent reaction).
ReplyDelete" grins" chicken ! whats a matter afraid you will get a spanking ?? "lol"
ReplyDeleteWell if you play with tops who don't like to spank over a heavily bruised bottom, THAT'S to your advantage. Not that you'd exploit the opportunity to fearlessly brat away day for 3 days and nights knowing your bottom is a wood free zone! Well that is until your weekend spanking finale ensues, then I guess you are at the mercy of your disciplinarian. :)
ReplyDeleteI personally love wooden paddles, they do intimidate me but after I've "survived" a hard bare bottomed paddling I always feel prouder and stronger than pre-paddling.
Well said, Erica, though I seem to recall hearing this sermon some time in the past. No matter. I'm sure the message is well received, by most anyway. Just remember it's still high alert wildfire season in Nevada, so be careful where you stage your bonfires.
ReplyDeleteWood for me is always a "don't go there" thing. Heck, I mark and bruise just from hand spankings!
ReplyDeletePlus, I plain don't like the sensation of feeling like I'm about to be catapulted head first into a wall or something and since for me, spanking isn't about pain or doing stuff I don't like, then I want to darn well like it! I'm unreasonable that way. LOL
I'm unreasonable that way
ReplyDeletehaha! Iggy! Too funny! I love that line! (may swipe it if ya don't mind!)
Kelly -- my problem is, I almost never bruise or mark anymore. So I come to the end of these weekends looking like I did when I started... but I am really, really hurting. And no one believes me! (sob)
ReplyDeleteDevlin -- of course you've heard it before. I've been hollering "wood sucks" practically since I got into the scene. :-D
Iggy -- Unreasonable?? You? Say it isn't so! ;-)
erica,
ReplyDeletei'm slowly going blind. i have a problem often with the small letters and editing.
you are she. no secret. you're you.
you should take a page from pixie and do a picture section on this blog.
i've tried every witch way but loose to get an email to you. no luck.
we share vanilla interests that don't belong here. i'm 69 yrs old and housebound in n.c. if you have the time get in touch.
bestest,
ddon
ddon -- I apologize; I won't tease you about spelling anymore. I'm a proofreader; it's what I do. :-) But I never mean offense.
ReplyDeleteDon , you notice in the post she got a paddling on her bed . thats cause she was naughty to you . see her im sorry look in her eyes . "grins"
ReplyDeleteErica, What were you thinking having an open flame that close to a Beatles poster? Are there not any laws in CA?
ReplyDeleteOS9 -- Not to worry. No Beatles posters were harmed in the creating of this blog.
ReplyDeleteHi Erica
ReplyDeleteI see you are a Beatles fan, I came down Menlove Avenue, Liverpool, the home of John Lennon where he lived with his Aunt Mimmie,earlier today.
What are your favourite Beatles tracks...?
I like..The Long And Winding Road and Imagine and also..And I Love Her.
Early Beatles..I like Baby It's You and Please Mr Postman.
Like the Picture of you in nice pink lace panties lying on the bed - think you have excellent tastes in underwear.
Your salmon pink bottom looks great to - especially on you.
I can see you laughing..Erica.