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The rest of you? Please take your judge-y selves somewhere more wholesome, like here: www.wonderbread.com

Go on.... shoo!



Monday, June 10, 2013

I hate colds

Hate hate HATE them! (like anyone loves them, right?) Arrgh.

Felt one coming on Friday afternoon. I called John and said, "I think I'm getting sick. Maybe I shouldn't come over." Nooooooooooo, he said. "I don't want to give you anything!" I protested. "You always get so much sicker than I do." He insisted that he would catch colds from the office anyway, and he missed me and wanted me to come over. I probably should have stuck to my guns, but John was persistent. And dammit, I wanted to see him too.

So I spent the weekend at his place. We had to cancel our visit to my stepdad, though, which really bummed me out. But there was no way I'm going to expose a 95-year-old man to cold germs -- that could kill him. So we did very little, just hung out. John took me out for comfort food: wonton soup, Japanese udon (noodles). Yesterday, I woke up with a raging headache and a ridiculous amount of pressure in my right ear, which kept popping as if I were on a plane. I told John I felt like my head was going to explode and my brains would come shooting out my ear. (Lovely imagery, huh?) Fortunately, as soon as I was able to eat something and take some Advil, the pain ebbed. John was worried about me. "The sparkle's gone out of your eyes," he said. 

Came home; managed to get some sleep, despite middle-of-the-night coughing fits. But of course, seeing Steve is out of the question. So is the gym. 

So let's review: one crappy little germ is not only making me miserable, but it deprived my stepdad of his visit, will most likely make John sick as well, kept me from my Steve fix and won't let me work out. What suckage! Steve wanted to know if he could bring some chicken soup or something and drop it off on my doorstep. But I don't need anything; I went to the store yesterday and bought groceries. So I don't want him bothering with that, although the offer was nice.

Here's the good news: At least I don't have to worry about calling in sick at a job and feeling guilty. This morning, I recalled a time about 20 years ago when I had gotten sick, then developed a secondary infection and had to miss about a week of work. Apparently, my boss had had to do all the proofreading, and they'd gotten swamped while I was gone.

When I finally came back, still feeling pretty weak, I was shocked at what I found at my desk. It looked like a cyclone had struck there. Everything was out of place, papers piled up all over, Post-it notes plastered everywhere. There were messy marked-up proofs strewn about, with my boss's Post-its on them: "See what you missed while you were gone?" "See what we had to deal with?" Another note, written in angry slashes: "You are not allowed to get sick EVER AGAIN!" But that wasn't the worst of it.

Our company "mascot" was a giraffe, as our slogan was "We're heads above the rest!" So we all had a little giraffe plush toy for our desks. My desk was right in front of a window with blinds, and as I surveyed the wreckage, my eye fell on the blinds and my blood froze. My boss had taken my giraffe and cut through its neck, leaving just a small piece intact. Then she'd wrapped the blind cord around the giraffe's semi-severed neck and left it hanging. And below that, another note was taped: "Yes, I got a little stressed out while you were gone."

Say it with me, kids: What a psycho! And people wonder why I refuse to go back to office work. 

So today, R & R. And hopefully quick recovery. I hope everyone had a nice weekend.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Friday Meme

Because I can't resist these things, I'm ending the week with the latest meme floating around. I confess, however, that I deleted five of the questions. I categorically refuse to answer stupid crap like "What's your favorite planet?" Of course, some would argue that everything in these memes is stupid crap. :-) OK, so stupid is relative. Anyway...

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? Can you think a groan?

2. How much cash do you have on you?  About $150.


3. Do you own more than 100 CDs?  No.  6/9 Correction -- actually, I do!

4. Have you ever finished off the popcorn and ate the junk from the bottom of the bag?  No, I don't like that stuff; it's too salty.

5. What kind of top are you wearing?  Light green cotton tank top.

6. Do you label yourself?  Literally? No. But I've assigned a few labels to myself, I suppose. (Loner, spanko, etc.)

7. Name the brand of shoes you are currently wearing? I'm barefoot at the moment.

8. Bright or dark room? For sleeping, as dark as possible. Otherwise, bright.

9. Have you ever been pooped on from the sky?  Me, no. My car, yes.

10. What does your watch look like?  I have several. My favorite is a vintage [brand deleted], 1956, with a stainless steel band and white face.

11. What were you doing at midnight last night?  Watching Jay Leno.

12. Have you ever done anything you could be arrested for?  I shoplifted gum and candy in my early teens. As an adult? I guess sex in a public park could get me arrested, yes.

13. Have you ever dated someone a decade older than you?  Briefly, when I was 30 (he was 44). It didn't end well.


14. Have you ever listened to a song and cried?  Yes. Death Cab for Cutie's I Will Follow You Into the Dark. It makes me choke up every time I hear it.

15. Who last told you he/she loved you?  John

16. What was the last furry thing you touched?  A leather paddle with fur on one side.

17. How many drugs have you done in the past three days?  My antidepressants, plus Tylenol.


18. Favorite age you have been so far?  Thirty-eight -- the age I came out as a spanko, and met John.

19. Have you ever had a secret crush on a teacher? A teacher, no. Not that I can recall. An aerobics instructor, yes.

20. What was the last thing you said to someone?  Bye, sweetie.


21. Have you ever been found sleep walking?  I once fell asleep in the living room and woke up in my bed. I don't remember going in there.

22. The last song you listened to?  Whatever song that "She and Him" were singing last night on the Tonight show. 

23. Where did you live in 1987?  An apartment in Tarzana.

24. Do you kiss with your eyes open or closed?  Closed.

25. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be? Italian

26. What was the last song you sang?  Not really a song; this is embarrassing. I was humming the theme song from "I Dream of Jeannie" in the shower. (I watch that show on MeTV.)


27. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone and mailed it?  A few months ago. A friend's mother who doesn't email.

28. Can you change the oil on a car?  The only thing I can do with a car is drive it. Can't change oil, can't change a tire, nothing. I'm such a girl.

29. How far back do you know about your ancestry?  I don't. Never was interested. 

30. When showering, do you start the water and then get in, or get in and then start the water?  Always start the water first and then get in when it's hot. Yes, I know I'm wasting water. Spank me.

31. Have you ever crashed a car?  I've had my car crashed into, but as far as my doing it, never more than a scrape or a dent.

32. Does every family have a crazy relative?  I think if you have just one, you're lucky.

34. Have you ever sent a prank call or email?  When I was a kid, way back before caller ID and Star 69 and so forth, my girlfriends and I used to make prank phone calls. Email? No.

35. How old do you look?  I think I'll leave that answer to the beholders.


Have a great weekend, y'all. :-)

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Fun shoot with Lily Starr

For those of you with sharp ears, you caught a line in my video with Steve where he said, "You're still sought after -- this Wednesday." He was referring to the mini-shoot I was scheduled to do with Lily Starr and her guy, Robert Wolf (SHwolfEEP on FetLife). They were in town for Robert's birthday, since he wanted to go to Magic Mountain, and were staying in a hotel right near me. Lily asked if I'd like to shoot some scenes with them, and I said absolutely.

It almost didn't happen. Yesterday was not a good day; just one of those days where everything kept going wrong, and I wanted to crawl back into bed and just end it. But I was due at their hotel at 5:00 and I am an adult, not a child. So I packed up all my outfits, washed and blew out my hair, made up my face. Meanwhile, I got a text from Lily, saying they were running a bit late and they would be arriving about 5:15-5:30. So I replied, suggesting she text me once they'd checked in, and then I'd drive over while they settled in. She agreed.

So, at 5:15, I was all ready to go, phone at the ready. Then it was 5:30, then 5:45, then 6:00. No text. I started worrying then, wondering if something had happened, maybe an accident? Lily is very good about returning messages and texts. At 6:20, I texted, "Are you OK? I'm getting worried." And then I got a text back: "We were wondering the same thing! I texted you an hour ago."

ARRGGGHHH!!! Freaking cell phones! I did not get that text. I don't know where it went, but it didn't go to my phone. Here I'd been sitting and waiting, and they were doing the same thing. And they had dinner plans that night. I felt awful.

"Still want me? I don't want to screw up your evening," I wrote. "Yes, of course, we're ready to shoot, come on over!" she wrote back. So I snatched up my stuff and dashed out. There was some traffic, but I still made it there by about 6:45. I was already dressed in my first scene outfit, so we got right into it.

Lily and Robert and I had been brainstorming back and forth over FetLife the past couple of weeks, coming up with scene ideas. We decided to do four scenes, keeping two of them fairly short so I could hold up. 1. Robert was my new boss, and I was pissed off because I don't want to take orders from someone younger; 2. I was Robert's mother-in-law and encouraging Lily to overspend on clothes and shoes and so forth, and generally meddling in their marriage; 3. Robert was an IRS auditor and I was very sloppy with my taxes, and 4. Robert, my husband of less than a year, snoops around and finds all my spanking paraphernalia, and learns not only that I have this fetish, but that I've been getting spanked by another man behind his back.

It was fun! And quick -- we knocked out each scene, I'd dash in to change, they'd adjust the lights for angles, and on to the next. The final scene was the longest and most intense, and I think we knocked it out of the park. Fun lines, too. Lily had the idea of telling Robert that the reason I saw another man for spanking was that he knew what he was doing, and trying to get Robert to understand what to do would be like training a new puppy. Brilliant! And in the office scenario, I fired off, "When I was getting my MBA, you were learning your ABC's." I got an incredible strapping from Robert in that last scene; when we cut so Lily could change camera angle, he said, "I love strapping you; this is like a birthday present." Guess it could have been my birthday too, then -- he is so damn good with that thing! So spot on. 

The hardest part of a shoot, I think, is trying to pull myself together afterward. I'm so used to just collapsing and lying around for a while, recovering, when I play privately, but last night, I wanted to clear out so they could go to dinner already -- it was about 8:15. I was a total space cadet; I nearly walked out without my clothing bag. And once I got home and unpacked, I discovered I'd left my toiletries bag there. Ack. Idiot. But it's OK. I'll run over there today and pick it up at the front desk, where Lily is leaving it for me.

I don't have any stills yet, but hopefully soon! Will let you guys know when the clips become available.

Today I feel sluggish, sleepy and sore, but peaceful. However, the gym will be challenging in a few hours! (shudder) Hope everyone is having a good week.

UPDATE & EDIT: Oh, screw it. I lied. I don't feel peaceful; I feel like crap today. Some sort of weird scene drop, perhaps. Plus residual bad feelings from other stuff yesterday. But there's no way I'm making it to the gym today. Think I need to get offline and distract myself with something else; my book, maybe. Later, kids.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Happy belated spankiversary

OK, so I got to celebrate my 17 years after all, just a week late. Steve arrived well prepared; he surprised me with a very cute "Congratulations" card, and he brought a tripod along with his camera, so we could shoot a fun little scene OTK on my couch.

Geeezus -- just missing one week makes a difference in my tolerance. The warm-up marked me! Just his hand! And that damned stubborn little weak spot on my lower right cheek opened. But I wasn't going to let that stop me, of course. It's happened many times before in the past few years, and I know it closes back up immediately. So we took a brief break while he set up the camera and then continued.

I had collected five OTK-friendly implements for him, and figured 17 with each, right? Ha. He had all these bright ideas about "multiples." Plus, besides counting, I had to say "happy anniversary" to myself after each stroke. How much do I love repeating phrases, kids? Yeah, you know. :-Þ 

Steve, of course, was delighting in all my grumbling and discomfort. "It's a special day!" he kept exhorting. "We're celebrating!" Oh, celebrate this.

You can tell as things progress that I'm struggling to keep the count correct! It's such a simple thing, but my brain struggles with keeping a count and processing pain at the same time. Which, naturally, is the whole point of making me do it. Arrggh.

Unfortunately, the camera shut off at one point, and we continued for a bit before we became aware of it. So there's a bit of an awkward cut-off, then we did our best to pick it up with Part 2. Therefore, these aren't quite Spanking Tube quality (I can just hear the critiques now), but they're more than fine to share here! We had a lot of fun; it was so good to see him. After he left, I was a very good girl and went to the gym, managing to beat the afternoon crowds.

So here you go -- hope you like these. :-)

Part 1:

MVI 0001 cut from Erica Scott on Vimeo.

And Part 2:

MVI 0002 cut from Erica Scott on Vimeo.

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Weekend recap

Forgive me, as this is dreadfully vanilla. But I suppose woman cannot live by spanking alone.

I think I'll pass on Friday night's party. Too many people, way too damn much alcohol, too noisy, too crowded, Mexican food (not a favorite), and we didn't leave until 11:30 (I was ready to leave right after we ate, but oh well...). Both John's sister and her daughter greeted me warmly, apologizing profusely for the baby shower invitation snafu, insisting that I please come anyway. The sister was already drunk and was blathering about how wonderful I am, and how heartbroken she was when there was that "brief breakup" a few years ago. She had no clue as to why we were on a break, so she just assumed it was because her dumbass little brother screwed up and I was taking a stand with him and teaching him some sort of lesson (which was not what it was about at all). I was squirming with embarrassment and wished she would shut up. I don't like thinking about that time, and why the hell she had to bring it up years later was beyond me. At least John kept me amused with his usual whispered running commentary about the guests, the clothes, the dancing, etc. For example, about a woman who was wearing a blue-and-white polka dot skirt, a gray-and-white striped top, a blue-and-yellow scarf tied in her hair and lime-green ballet flats: "Does she own any mirrors?" Even his own nephew, who was wearing bright green skinny jeans, didn't escape. John looked at him and said, "You're actually wearing those?" He laughed and answered, "They were a birthday present!" To which John said, "Please tell me that the present wasn't for YOU!" And people say I'm snarky. Ah, I love that man. :-)

Saturday was lovely. The Chorale Bel Canto/Beethoven concert was in a beautiful church in Pasadena; unfortunately, it wasn't air-conditioned. But luckily, the promised 103 degrees didn't materialize (although 90s was plenty). The music was so lush, I forgot about the temperature and sat absolutely still, feeling it sweep over me. We were right up front, so we could see all the individual instruments and hear them blending, watch the intense expression on the pianist's face, see every bead of perspiration. Afterward, we stayed for a while to chat with John's colleague (who was one of the tenors in the chorus) and then went to Old Town for dinner at one of our favorite restaurants. John looked so handsome in his dress slacks and blue shirt, but I know the poor thing was boiling! I was much more comfortable in a sundress with bare legs.

So today, I went to the shower. I purposely went late, and I have to say, my timing was perfect. I got there just as they were finishing up lunch (I'd gone to brunch with John instead) and M was getting ready to open the gifts, so I didn't have to make any chitchat. The place looked very festive, and I had to give major kudos to the creative centerpieces at each table: Tonka toy dump trucks, filled with white and yellow daisies and white roses. There were baby-boy sugar cookies, decorated with blue frosting (and diapered with white frosting), and even the water bottles had "It's a Boy" ribbons tied on them. M is one of the most amazing pregnant women I've ever seen. She's always had this coltish little body, all skinny arms and legs. Now, with her due date in three weeks, she looks like she tucked a compact, oblong little watermelon under her shirt; the rest of her had not changed one bit. If you see her from the back, you can't tell anything. I stayed while she opened all the presents, and then took off. She did get some very cute things: a lot of onesies and PJs, a beautiful crocheted blanket from her mother-in-law, tons of baby books and other goodies. I think this kid will be well cared for. I probably should cut M some slack; she was an obnoxious, disrespectful teenager when I first met her, but now she's 32. And she can't help it that her mother is a lush and her dad is a lech.

Anyway... I know I made John happy, going today. And my reward is tomorrow morning!! :-D  It's about damn time, too. Enough already with pinkeye. Time for redbutt!