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Friday, May 2, 2014

Oh, the things you find on Facebook

You've all heard me snark about how vanilla and boring Facebook is, right? Land of Candy Crush saga, family and friends spying on you, and exes stalking you. Where it's rather pointless to have a kinky profile -- that's what FetLife is for, right?

Which is why, although I use my scene name, I keep my profile on Facebook fairly vanilla. I've posted a couple of semi-sexy photos, but never any spanky ones. I don't broadcast my proclivities, out of respect for friends who are trying to maintain a low profile themselves. So why do I bother? Because: 1) it does help me keep in touch with the few vanilla friends I have; 2) I love to play Scrabble there; and 3) I actually find some of the funniest, dirtiest photos there.

Those blasphemous pictures I posted on my Easter blog? Yep. Facebook.

And here, for your Friday amusement, are a few more I found just this week. The caption that went with this one: "Tag placement is everything."

Now, while this made me giggle, I could see upon closer inspection that it's a fake. The box must have been printed with "THIS SIDE UP," and someone cleverly replaced the I in SIDE with LI. Still funny, though.

Apologies in advance if this offends anyone, but it made me go Whaaaat?

Uh... good to know, thanks. By the way, using that logic, that would mean you also can't hold hands with God while you're driving a car, or eating a sandwich, or washing your hair.

And finally -- raise your hands, people. How many of us would like to have this t-shirt? I've love to sell them in mass quantities at the next weekend spanking party. :-D

I think they should have made Dino with a red tail, but perhaps that would be a bit much.

Have a great weekend, y'all.


  1. The Dino is CUTE as hell! :)
    I don't play any FB games, but there are hilarious jokes posted all the time in my feed.
    Then there's the spanking depiction where it says something like, "If we had more of THIS... today there would be less..." I can't recall it exactly but I never click like or comment on it.

  2. Kelly -- yeah, I've seen those. They give me the creeps. I too would never click Like on anything that encourages the spanking of children.

  3. Erica, I have the first picture in my FAILs folder, but I didn't notice the addition of the letter in "side".

    I'm a big Candy Crush fan, but I play it on my iPad. There's no need to go anywhere near Facebook that way.


  4. I don't think I'm going to wear that T-shirt ;-) but if you delive overseas I'll definitecly buy one as a present.

  5. subhub -- yup!

    Hermione -- ah, I'd wondered if you'd ever posted any of these! I couldn't recall. As for the letter addition, hey, I'm a proofreader. I notice these things. :-)

    MrJ -- I don't think I'd have the nerve to wear it publicly. But it would be fun at a party.

  6. I'll take issue with the second image. My remedy is this: just switch hands. God doesn't care about masturbation, in my not so humble opinion. She wants us to be happy, not frustrated.

    With my orientation, I've dropped my Face Book page. I use e-mail to keep in touch with those who might otherwise object to my proclivities.

  7. Hi Erica -- I keep my FB page Vanilla too,because of nosey spies. Those pics are so funny LOL :-) I Love the Dino, I want a shirt like that it's so ADORABLE. Much Love and hugs from naughty girl Jade

  8. AP -- I figure if anyone on FB doesn't like the proclivities that I dance around, they can unfriend me. I don't spend much time there, really.

    Jade -- that's probably the best idea.

  9. The Facebook post I've seen that came closest to having spanking overtones is the "fun with statues" photo sequence, where a Patty Hearst-in-her-heyday look-alike is kneeling over the lap of a statue with her bottom lifted to meet the statue's upraised hand :) I like it because I think the woman is having fun, and the statue's not exactly smiling but I think he is too.

  10. Anonymous -- that sounds familiar. I've probably seen that at some point.