Vanilla and kink worlds, that is. That happened to me this week. Bear with me while I set up the story.
A couple of months ago, I received email from a friend who knows who my father was. He wrote, "Did you know that your dad is mentioned in [name deleted for discretion]'s autobiography?"
I was confused. I knew who the author is; she's an actress and comic, around my age, and she has a disability which she often pokes fun at in her standup act. "Do you mean my cousin is mentioned?" I wrote back. I know she worked on one of my cousin's TV shows in the 70s-80s.
"No, your dad," he replied. He went on to explain that in the early 80s, my dad pitched a TV pilot for her and they had several meetings. The pilot didn't sell, but they became good friends. And he gave her a very special gift, one she never forgot.
Wow. Yet another story I didn't know about my father. Now that he mentioned it, I remembered Dad talking about that pilot. I remembered the name.
I Googled the actress, whom I will call G, and found that she has her own website, which I searched until I found a contact email. I then wrote to her, introducing myself (with my real name, of course) and thanking her for the kind mention of my dad in her book.
Her email back to me was lovely, bubbling with enthusiasm about how delighted she was to hear from me, that she'd always hoped that somehow we could connect but she had no idea how to find me, how much she'd loved my dad, etc.
She also sent me a friend request for Facebook. I'd written to her with the address that's connected to my Facebook account, and she found me that way.
Except on Facebook, I'm Erica Scott. Oops.
I really don't know why I'm even on Facebook. It's so relentlessly vanilla and boring, and even though a lot of fellow spankos are on there, they're on with their real names, family and work connections, etc. I have no interest in apps and games, and I couldn't care less about Farmville, Zooville or any other ville. If you look at my profile, it's not readily obvious what I'm into; I have no spanky pictures, and in my description, all I say is, "There is more to me than meets the eye, and let's just leave it at that." However, my friend list has a lot of kinky-sounding names in it. And I list my blog under Website. So anyone with even a modicum of curiosity could figure it out with a couple of mouse clicks.
I accepted her friendship invite. She wrote me a couple of messages on there, but all she commented on was my love for Dark Shadows, which she shared. On my birthday, she posted a greeting on my wall and said that when her schedule freed up, she'd love to meet for coffee/dinner.
Very long story somewhat shortened, we met this past Wednesday at a local deli halfway between us (turns out she lives about 10 miles from me). I felt instantly like I'd known her for years.
We talked and talked and talked. She'd brought me a copy of her book, and told me about a lot of the stuff in it, how she'd revealed a lot of secrets (about herself, about Hollywood, etc.), bluntly discussed her disability and what it was like growing up with that, and so on. She talked about my dad and cousin, and shared stories of them. I ate it all up.
And then G said, "So, what about you?" "What about me?" I hedged. "Tell me about you," she said, picking up her sandwich. Clearly, it was my turn to talk.
So I told her the usual boring stuff. Never married, no kids. Lived alone since I was 17. With the same man for 15 years, but we don't live together. College grad, work as a proofreader/copyeditor. Blah blah blah.
"And? What else?" she asked. Her gaze was calm and direct. I wondered how much she'd figured out. If she had questions, she wasn't asking them. She was letting me decide what to tell.
I don't understand why, but this woman, whom I'd known for about an hour, suddenly seemed like an old, dear friend and I wanted to tell her. I knew so much about her, and I wanted her to know about me. And my instincts told me I could trust her and she wouldn't judge.
"Well," I said, fiddling with my coffee cup. "Did you wonder why I'm Erica Scott on Facebook?" "Yup, that thought crossed my mind," she answered.
"And did you happen to look at my friends list?" I went on. She nodded. "I did... interesting collection of names," she said, smiling. Oh, screw it, Erica. Tell her.
So I did. I told her who Erica Scott is and what she's into. Not in detail; she didn't need to hear all that right off the bat. Just a brief outline -- the kink, the wiring since childhood, "coming out" later in life, finding John, getting into videos. I said that in a small circle, I was well known. I also told her that no one in my family knew.
Her gaze never wavered, she didn't bat an eye. She got it. She may not be kinky, but she knows what it's like to feel different.
I told G about my book and shared my own process of writing it. She said she wanted to read it. I hesitated. "I hope it won't offend you," I said. "There's some pretty explicit stuff in there."
"Please," she scoffed. "Don't you get it? I'm a comedian. Nothing offends me!"
Three hours flew by. I was so overjoyed to meet her, to talk with her. She was a connection to my past, to my father. Pretty much everyone in his world has died, but here was someone my age, full of stories and memories. She told me things my father had said to her and I could practically hear him saying them.
And it felt SO good to hang out with a new friend and to be able to be both Erica Scott AND Erica [real name], not just one or the other.
Before we left, she autographed her book for me, signing it "Your new old friend, G." I got her mailing address and the next day, I arranged to have one of my books shipped to her. I also got a sweet message from her, saying what a pleasure it was to meet me and she looked forward to getting to know me better. And that she honored my trust.
How about that, huh?
In other news: Looks like LOL Day #6 was a success. I feel like I spent most of my day yesterday reading all the LOL blogs, reading comments and adding my own to others. For everyone who dropped by and said hello, thank you!
My third Spanking Court clip may go up this Monday. I hope. Stay tuned. Cali said the remaining three will go up one per month (December, January, February). I can't wait! Meanwhile, she sent me some fun pictures to tide me over. I posted this one on FetLife, so I'll put it up here too. It's from Scene #4, when I dragged the Disciplinarian into court with me, complaining about him to the Judge. Check out the look on V's face!
This makes me snicker every time I look at it.
Have a great weekend, y'all. And to our vets: THANK YOU.
Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken kinkophile and unapologetic attention wh--, um, hog.
PLEASE NOTE: This blog contains adult subjects and content, and because of Google/Blogger's recent nonsense, I HAVE MOVED TO WORDPRESS. For my enlightened friends who wish to visit me in my new home, it's https://ericalscott.wordpress.com. Please bookmark it!
The rest of you? Please take your judge-y selves somewhere more wholesome, like here: www.wonderbread.com
Go on.... shoo!
The rest of you? Please take your judge-y selves somewhere more wholesome, like here: www.wonderbread.com
Go on.... shoo!
Isn't it nice to have friend that know? I have a select few, some who have known me since childhood, a few that have worked with me, and they know.
ReplyDeleteIt's like I can tell them about EVERYTHING I'm working on, and the best part? They never judge.
Some of them are kinky, some of them are not, but they are all my friends. I think that's special.
Lunargirl
Hi Erica,I am so happy for you that you got to meet and be a new friend to one of your dad's friend's that is so AWESOME :-)I am also happy that she didn't judge you cause you like spanking :-)The only person that know's about me being into spanking is my dad he is COOL with it put the rest of my family and friends i keep it a secret cause they would not accept it but who care's what they think it's my bum getting spanked not their's hehehe LOL.The pic you put up of you and V made me snicker as well hehehe LMAO,The expression on his face is PRICELESS :-) Wishing you and John a fun and relaxing weekend. much love to you both and big hug's from your naughty girl Jade XOXO
ReplyDeleteLunargirl -- see, it's different with me. Most of the people in my life these days are fellow kinks, so of course they know. But anyone from my BK (Before Kink) years -- family, older friends, employers, etc. -- have no idea. It's a very special feeling to know someone from the vanilla past who is now aware of my present.
ReplyDeleteJade -- a lot of people don't get it. So the people who DO get it are very special indeed.
Okay, that picture again at the end!! I crack up everytime I see it!
ReplyDeleteI actually have separate email addresses for stuff so a mixup like that doesn't happen! Very few people outside of my family - and I mean VERY few - have my personal vanilla e-mail address. I have a three purely vanilla emails, one slightly a mixture of both but mostly vanilla, and three spanking ones. Don't ask me about how I keep up with them -- I don't really have to. One vanilla and one kink are my main modes of email connection. The others are used for various business conduction, where solicitations and stuff get sent so checking every now and then suffices.
It was nice that she is so accepting! :)
sarah
ROFLMHO!
ReplyDeleteThat picture is so funny. The dynamics and expressions are super. Love it.
It is really nice that you met someone who knew your dad and accepts you for who you are. That is something special. I am happy you got to meet her.
What a beautiful story Erica. You made a lifelong friend in G, when you had a heart to heart conversation with her. If you give it a chance, lots of people will find your lifestyle worthy. So please be positive. I love you, my 'yiddishe' friend.
ReplyDeleteSarah -- I have two kink email addresses and one vanilla, which I use ONLY for work and people who don't know about my kink. I should have written to her with that address, but I didn't think. Fortunately, it worked out well!
ReplyDeleteBobbie Jo -- his facial expressions speak volumes, don't they?
six -- oh, I hope she will be around for that long; I'd like that.
Erica,
ReplyDeleteI was referring to both of you. Your expression had a few daggers in it. His expression looks to me as if he is trying not to laugh. His eyes are telling me that. Then, too, he is leaning away and almost saying, "WT..." It is really funny.
I hope you will have a long friedship with G. It would be so great to have someone like that and I think it would be good for both of you.
I love the exchanged look between you two in this pic. Hehe. That's wonderful that you could connect with someone who could share some fun stories about your dad.
ReplyDeleteThat is so great that you were able to connect to someone and feel comfortable. Also, the expressions on your faces in that last picture is priceless.
ReplyDeleteLea -- it felt great, truly.
ReplyDeletejoey -- thanks. :-)
That's an awesome story, Erica. Thanks for sharing. You know I can't get enough of your "old days" tales...
ReplyDeleteGlad it all worked out meeting someone who knew your dad. Even better that you were able to trust her and it must have felt good to be honest while being accepted. Nice true story with a happy ending. 2Good
ReplyDeleteHi Erica, That is a very touching story I can only imagine how great it must feel to meet a new friend that you can be so open and honest with not to mention the connection with your father.
ReplyDeleteThis is my frist comment on you blog but I have been a long time lurker and I always enjoy my visits here. I also just finish reading your new book and as a fellow spanko (a male bottom) I enjoyed it very much. I could really relate to alot of it and I especialy like what you said on the last page about "this thing we do" you are a very admirable and couragous women!
Erica, I am overjoyed reading this! Your "new old" relationship with G is a wonderful thing for so many reasons; I believe it will fill a lack and bring you both joy.
ReplyDeleteAs initially scary as that may have been, it's really great she seemed determined to find out more in depth detail on you. She's truly interested in having a friendship with you. And a comic at that! You too will make each other's sides hurt from your laugh fests. :)
ReplyDeleteCraig -- and the cool part is, I actually tell you who I'm talking about! lol
ReplyDelete2Good -- it was indeed nice; thanks!
Glen -- welcome! Thanks for commenting and I'm happy you liked my book.
Dave -- she's a very busy woman, so I don't know how often we'll be in communication, but it sure is a nice start!
Kelly -- she really did adore my dad, so I guess our finding each other was as special for her as it was for me. And yes, she's funny!
Erica, this is a wondeful post. The start of a new friendship and a connection to the past, real, exciting, living. Not the every day "look at my dog in reindeer antlers" fluff I see every day. Erica, you are awesome! -- Redchief.
ReplyDeleteRedchief -- thanks! :-)
ReplyDelete